Worry is a cycle of inefficient thoughts whirling around a center of fear. – Corrie Ten Boom
As a child, teenager and young adult I experienced bouts of worry that were common among most people my age.
Looking back on those years, I now realize that my encounters with worry were more frequent, intense, and longer-lasting than those of my friends and family.
Self-image, self-confidence and acceptance by my peers were crucial during those years. As a result, I refrained from discussing my feelings with anyone else.
Because these episodes seemed to end as quickly as they began, I assumed that they simply were part of growing up.
Was my assumption correct, or was this an initial stage of my bipolar disorder?
At that time, I would not have known the answer to the question, nor even understood it.
Frankly, to this day, the answer still eludes me.
Worry and I had been passing acquaintances during my childhood. In high school, however, we became fast, lifelong friends, spending many sleepless nights together studying and agonizing about the future. It was such a clever disguise that not once did I suspect that Worry was my old friend, Fear. – Excerpt from “I’m Afraid”
When I was growing up, everybody was worried about something, and they were not afraid to say so; some seemed not only to enjoy expounding on them but tended to employ exaggeration for effect.
I entered the fray, provoking laughter with self-deprecatory humor that not only entertained my friends, but also eased the pain of my own worries.
I never associated worry with fear; not until I was diagnosed with bipolar disorder and cerebellitis.
I now believe that worry is not simply associated with fear… Worry is a child of Fear.
I offer these thoughts for your consideration.
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The saga continues in my next blog.
Do Not Be Afraid!!!