In sharing his journey with I’m Afraid: A Memoir, Kurt Haarmeyer has given us an inspiring trip through physical, mental, and emotional hell. While we may not all have had the experiences he had, we have all traveled with fear and at times have let fear take over and control us. Kurt’s book is testimony not so much to overcoming fear as to making peace with it. By illustrating everything from a vibrant support system to using poetry to face fear, Kurt gives us a range of skills for facing our own fears. But more than anything, he offers hope. He has paid his dues and so his message of hope is not some flowery piece of piety. His message of hope is realistic and down-to-earth. It merits our attention. — Richard B. Patterson, PhD, Psychologist, and Author of Turtle on the Fencepost
Dr. Haarmeyer’s story is a triumph of the human spirit, of faith and of the power of relationships to heal. It is also a tribute to the role of humor in changing the stage set so that the play can move in a different and better direction. — Barbara K. Kinder, MD
I found Dr. Haarmeyer’s story to be an honest, riveting account of living a life of fear from the debilitating diseases of cerebellitis and bipolar depression. Dr. Peter Haarmeyer speaks of the fear we all experience whether for a moment, a day, or a lifetime. He has faced, battled, and continues to struggle with it-sometimes victorious, sometimes defeated. It is a good read and an inspiration to all of us who face a life of disability. — David J. Wenzel, published author, former member of the National Council on Disability, and former Mayor of the City of Scranton
Reviews from Amazon.com
Five Stars: Difficult Times
by Martha G.
A man in the prime of his life, Peter Kurt Haarmeyer, enjoyed success. He had built a dental practice in which he could take pride. Married only a few years to a beautiful, creative woman, he had an active social and professional life. Although previously diagnosed as bipolar, he was fortunate that his body responded well to lithium and his condition was manageable. Suddenly, he was struck by a rare and debilitating illness which changed his life forever. This book is a brave and honest account of what it has been like to face the unknown, the physical challenges, the loss of his career and livelihood. Kurt talks of fear on nearly page but it took real courage to lay bare his thoughts, emotions, worries, and daily humiliations. Kurt’s intelligence and humor shine through in this eloquent, thoughtful and heart wrenching retelling of his story. It is a tribute to friendship, to love, and to faith.
Five Stars: A Good Read
by Maggie Mariotti
“I’m Afraid” is an incredibly honest essay. Kurt is able to put into words the strategies that he had to employ as he absorbed the enormity of his physical condition. Moving from one day to the next with no answers, he and his wife graciously recognized their own “new normal” – Kurt recognizing that he would no longer work as a dentist and Laura supporting him in all of the difficult decisions that seemed to present themselves daily. It is a sensitive book that gives insight in to the struggle that any patient could go through in adapting to a physical disability. A good read.
Five Stars: I Feel Like I Know Him Better Now
by Michele C. Sickle
Well, I just finished reading this book and I’m not quite sure how to describe it. I read it all in one sitting, I couldn’t put it down. One of the first things that comes to mind is that Kurt and Laura were made for each other. I was lucky to have had the opportunity to teach with Laura but I only met Kurt a few times. I feel like I know him so much better now. I love how their love story is woven throughout the book. His story made me smile and cry and is so well written. Definitely inspiring.
Five Stars: Honest and Inspirational
by Aimee K. Page
I’M AFRAID is a moving and intimate look into how one man deals with personal and professional challenges when coming face to face with not one but two life-changing illnesses. Brutally honest with peeks of Kurt’s delightful sense of humor, this book depicts the journey of his life that is both heart rending and inspirational. It is a must read for anyone with similar issues and also for those without. A real page turner – I could not put it down. Aimee K. Page
Four Stars: So Glad I Read This For So Many Reasons
by Liz
This courageous, well-written memoir addresses the fall from pride and self-importance that Kurt experiences through, first, his diagnosis of bipolar disorder, and then second, his diagnosis of cerebellitis, which causes the loss of his independence, his career, clear language and confident mobility. His “normal” turns to self-doubt, anger, embarrassment and diminished income. It is a hell that he and his wife, Laura, have lived, have survived and have made peace with. And best of all, Kurt finds a relationship with God that is inspiring to me and sustains him. Everyone can find something in this memoir to identify with. My heart ached for him and Laura as they navigated some pretty awful stuff, but Kurt’s (and Laura’s) observations and attitudes provide a path for me to follow when life doesn’t proceed as I’d hope. This novel is an important one for anyone who has struggled in life. It’s hopeful and inspiring. And the last two lines? I am still afraid. But I am less afraid. Perfect.
5 Stars: Wonderful Book
by Mary W.
Very thought-provoking memoir of a professional man facing mental and physical illness and his emotional and spiritual struggles to face these challenges and find a life different from what he had envisioned. It is also a tribute to his wife, Laura, who is obviously a source of strength for Kurt. I could not put it down and learned a great deal from it both about adversity and dealing with my own problems. A wonderful book!
5 Stars: Highly Recommend
by Tim
Very powerful look into oneself. Interesting that the reader can absorb many of Kurt’ s feelings and reactions to fear. Highly recommend!
5 Stars: A Well-Written, Touching Account of One Man’s Struggles
by John Patrick Killian
A well written, touching account of one man’s struggles with what one would think are unbearable difficulties. The strength demonstrated by the author in dealing with these personal, physical and professional struggles is truly inspiring. Do yourself a favor and read this book.
5 Stars: A Reader
by Don
Great Book!
Reviews From Infinity Publishing Author’s Page
5 Stars: Reviewed by JeanMarie Warpus
What a fantastic read of true emotions as the author faced the loss of independence and the roller coaster ride of hope and fear. The book shares the road the author traveled – and it is so well written that you feel as if you are traveling with him. One group of people who should have this on their must read list are those in the health care fields. Unless we are in denial each of us have faced demons – we should all have the hope and positive motivation that the author describes. His book is gift for each of us.
Five Stars: Reviewed by Robert J. Mellow
A very moving story about a professional man who because of illness gave up everything he worked very hard for, a lesser person would have succumb to such a tragedy. Kurt is a wonderful man, I learned a lot about myself after reading his book. Congratulations on a great book!! K
5 Stars: Reviewed by Kevin G. Madden
This is an intensely honest work, told in a vigorous and lucid way. The larger themes are introduced elegantly and seamlessly. As has been commented upon by some of the other reviewers, many of the issues raised resonated deeply with me. It is a difficult book to put down, once started.
5 Stars: Reviewed by Mary Ellen
An inspiring story of love and faith. Kurt’s struggle and his ability to overcome physical and emotional challenges is remarkable. I couldn’t put this book down. A very special person and author.
5 Stars: Reviewed by William J. Nealon, Jr.
“I’m Afraid” is a masterful account of Kurt Haarmeyer’s difficult life journey with fear, guilt, depression, worry, and doubt serving as his constant companions. A sincerely and emotionally written story, Kurt humanizes his tale by making the reader feel they are actually witnessing and not reading his many life challenges. Plagued with cerebellitis and bipolar depression, Kurt comes center stage by acknowledging his physical and mental battles and refusing to mask or shield the reality and severity of the consequences of his debilitating condition. Through his own strength, determination and faith coupled with his wife’s love, support and patience, Kurt finds peace and comfort with his condition and life through faith and poetry. Spontaneously creating poetic treasures, Kurt poignantly captures many moments by opening his heart, sharing his feelings, relieving his pain, and lightening his load. Building a ladder with patience, humility, good humor, mercy, trust, and surrender serving as the rungs, Kurt is able to ascend each step, view the blue sky, feel the warm sun, breathe the sweet air, and witness the magical power and majesty of God. A touching and pure life story, Kurt early on drafts a poem in which he writes: “I’m afraid I’ll never create another smile” (or) never relieve another pain, (and will never be) the healer I was learning to be”. However, upon reading Kurt’s story, how mistaken he was. In the final analysis, his words and message will surely create more smiles, relieve more pain, and heal more people than any dentist will ever know.
5 Stars: Reviewed by Theresa Stascavage
Dr. Haarmeyers books a beautifully written narrative of his struggles. It is an honest look at the emotions we go through when faced with extreme difficulties. Because of his faith, his loving relationship with Laura and his willingness to embrace life he has put fear in its place.
5 Stars: Reviewed Ingeborg Frye
This well written and soulful account of Kurt’s life altering set-backs will affect the reader in a profound way. It is both a revelation as it is an inspirational journey, an account of a life on an emotional roller-coaster while Kurt re-invents his life flanked by bravery, hope, fear, faith, and tremendous perseverance. The continuous support, love, and dedication of Laura weaves throughout Kurt’s life story as does his own belief system. A must read page-turner for anybody who is open to a newly found appreciation for life, a source of inspiration and encouragement. Yes there is light at the end of the tunnel so long as one is willing to seek it! Kurt is living proof!